for Michael Brown.

Josh T. Pearson, ringing in my ear,
telling me shit that I don't need to hear,
as midnight rolled around about five minutes hence,
and no longer I find myself straddling the fence.
My blood is on fire and my body is heat,
I'm struggling to be quiet, to keep to my seat.
I'm pacing the length of my room head to foot
I'm burning my bridges to ashes and soot.
My emotions are roiling like a tsunami, a flood
and I've bitten my fingers til they're dripping with blood.
I'm an animal caged, walking to and fro,
unable to fight, but unable to go.
I can't turn away, can't avert my eyes; 
I can only look up, and turn to the skies.
I spit rhetoric into the dusky night air,
and my neighbors can hear me but I don't fucking care.
"Is white more important than life?" I slur,
my damaging words for that despicable cur.
"'I don't care who started it,' isn't that what they say
when they just want to make sure it all stays that way?
What happened to justice? Are we so vain
that we'll plug our ears while they're calling our name?
Atticus was right, only children weep!
I curse your fucking name if tonight soundly you sleep!"
A man ran until the soles of his shoes turned to dust,
And I'm puking for every time I've said 'in God we trust!'
I know what I know, and now I won't forget.
I'll do what I want to and have no regret.
If I could but offer a kind gentle hand,
for that is my duty, as is God's command,
I'd cherish the children and help where I could,
give drink to the thirsty, warm the fire with wood.
I'm not a warrior in the depth of my soul,
I'm an empath, the weakest, but this shit takes its toll.
I'd go to help at once, don't you see?
I'd take care of those who really needed me.
I've cried more than once on this trying night,
when for a moment I felt that my future was bright.
This night leaves me no longer the reclusive strange;
this night leaves me ragged and howling for change.
No longer am I your oblivious child,
I've grown up, mother, and now I am wild.